How To Measure The Right Bra Size
An astonishing amount of women don’t know how to find the right bra. Include me in that number. Up to press, I’ve always bought bras that looked as though they’d fit. You know, look down at my chest, look up at a line of bras - and measure by the eye.
On the occasion that I started measuring by hand I managed to engage a store assistant’s attention. I decided to knock off what must have looked like a moment of public self-gratification somewhere between her eyebrow raising like Angelina Jolie caught off guard and her rather obvious intention to come over and actually speak to me.
That day I returned home with two bras that I wouldn’t have fit into when I was 15. I just felt like I had to buy something, in order to make amends.
How To Find The Right Bra
So, how to find the right bra? Well listen up ladies, I’ve got some great chest enhancing, body slimming booby advice. And I’m sharing it because no one ever bothered to educate me on what correct bra measuring is or the intricacies of fitting the right bra.
Follow me, firmly upholstered as I am (now) into the breach – lets talk about our boobies.
NB – if you’re a guy and like to wear women’s clothing, please feel free to apply the following to your fantasy boobs. You’ll find no prejudice here.
Correct Bra Measuring
Bra Cup Size
You Will Need ...
Bra Size Measuring Video - Only Watch to 2.20 - The Rest Is Advertising
Now I know the correct bra measuring technique, I feel a little silly. But then again, I don't think I'm alone so you know, if you're here reading this, either you're like me or you're a man hoping to see pictures of near-naked women.
I’ve written the method down in step-by-step form, as it was explained to me. Of course I’m providing pictures, using myself as the model.
I look good, I know it, and you don’t, so I’m sharing more than just my new found knowledge.
Measuring your correct band size:
- Make sure you’re wearing a really lightweight bra. Nothing padded, just plain and without embellishments.
- Using a tailors measuring tape, measure around your body, right below the line of your bossom.
- Don’t allow the tape to go slack and drop down – make sure the line is as straight as possible all the way around.
- Now – write down the measurement.
- Next: if the number is odd, add another five inch to the measurement – four inches if it’s an even number.
- Example – you measure 30in – add 4in – therefore your band size is 34in.
- If your initial measurement hits 36 or above, only add an extra 2in for odd, 1in if it’s even.
Measuring your correct bra cup size:
- Repeat steps #1 and #2 from above – only place the tape around the fullest part of your chest.
- Next, simply subtract the measurement from your band size
- Example – if your band size was 35in and you measure 34in around your bust line, then your cup size is an A. Refer to the chart below for correct cup sizing.
And that's it. Consider yourself measured correctly. Now you know exactly how to find the right bra size. Sausage back begone.
That's the plan anyway. Just follow the rest of the tips and you'll soon be as delightfully reupholstered as a counch with a make-over.
Only you'll have more appeal that an old couch newly covered. Or at least ... that's the plan.
How To Determine Bra Cup
Less than 1 inch
DD Cup - E
DDD Cup - F
DDDD Cup - G
Wearing The Right Bra
You know - wearing the right bra not only does wonders for your bossom (fits better, feels better - upholstered better) but it also makes you look slimmer. Great huh? More bang for your buck.
Correctly fitting bras mean perter looking boobs and slimmer looking bodies. Trying to squash a quart into a pint pot will always look as though it's overflowing. One of the laws of physics. If it's too big, be prepared for spillage.
And bra spillage usually occurs by way of:
- the sausage back effect
- underarm fat rolls
- too many puppies in too small a basket
The last one is usually alluring to men but 'fess up ladies - who wears a badly fitting boulder-holder and spends the day fiddling about, scooping escaping flesh back into a space that's going to immediately eject the excess once you're sat in that really important conference of job interview? *breathes*
And who hasn't performed the quick and snappy back-band shuffle? The shoulder strap tweak? The under-wire scoop? I like to think of these moves as something akin to all-in wrestling techniques.
Only your oppopent isn't a big sweaty hunk of muscle. It's two over-rated wobbly bumps and about 34inches of badly fitting elastic. I'll take Hulk Hogan thanks. At least when he's dealt with, he stays where he's put ...
Correct Bra Size - Tips
To finish, some correct bra size tips. All handy hints to back up the right bra size information already laid out for your viewing pleasure. Read 'em and take note. They're helpful, they're factual and they're intended to help you further suss out the great right bra size mystery.
- Try on at least a dozen bras. Even with the correct measurements to hand, you'll still need to make sure that the bra fits correctly
- Most of the support that you get from any bra actually comes from the band. And that's why it's so important to make sure your band size is measured correctly!
- A correctly fitting bra will sit flat on your rib cage - and it should be centred. If it bags away from you ribs, try another bra on. If it's one you already own - throw it in the trash, it doesn't fit
- Measure yourself if you gain or lose weight. Makes sense to assume that if your waist has dropped or gained a size - so has your bra size
- Remember: if the above occurs, each time your band size increases or decreases, the cup size follows suit
- It won't hurt to have yourself professionally fitted. If you have access to this service - use it
- The straps should sit comfortably on your shoulders. No cutting in or dropping - just sat, comfortably - and doing their job
- The back band should sit slightly lower than the bra front. It should feel snug without feeling tight. If you've got sausages going on, it's too tight - adjust it. If that doesn't improve matters enough to make the bra feel comfortable and snug, try another bra
All you have to to (now) is go shopping. There's no point having the right measurements yet you're still left with a drawer full of baly fitting bras.
Get your coat, your husbands wallet and hit the high street. And don't worry about his reaction when you return home having maxed his card out. Just give him a couple of his favorite toys to play with.
You know - the ones his money just covered in something lacy, alluring - and correctly fitting.