EB Black can't imagine life without glasses and enjoys sharing the humorous side of being a glasses-wearer.
Glasses aren't merely accessories for some of us. They help us function by giving us the ability to see. They might be one of the most expensive things we wear on our bodies, but they are worth their price tag.
We're used to wearing glasses now, but many of us were resistant at first. Bad vision happens gradually, and it's easy to adjust and pretend your vision isn't going bad as it's happening. But now that we've given in to wearing them, we can't imagine our lives without them.
Here is a list of things that only people who wear glasses (and are blind without them) understand.
1. People Always Telling You How Great You'd Look If You Didn't Wear Glasses
People always want to fix you. They think the fact that you wear glasses shows that there is something "wrong" with you. You should wear contacts. You would look so much better with contacts. But you like wearing glasses and that will always sit wrong with certain people.
2. How Hard It Is to Try to Find Your Glasses Without Your Glasses On
Even if I were to grab my glasses and purposefully drop them at my feet on a floor with nothing else on it, I would have difficulty finding my glasses. This is why sometimes I keep my old pairs of scratched up glasses in drawers I can easily access. They aren't the right prescription anymore, but they are better than nothing and can sometimes help me find my glasses when I lose them and am alone.
Anyone who is near-sighted like me has had to feel around the floor or the counter or their bed to find their glasses. We've all accidentally knocked them onto the floor, too, when feeling for them and cursed loudly either in our head or out loud because of it.
It's panic-inducing. You're scared you will never find them or that you'll step on them, but once you get them again, it's the most relieving feeling in the world.
3. Keeping Your Glasses Close to You While You Sleep, Just in Case
Sometimes I get scared someone will break into my house someday. Even worse, I get scared they will break into my house and I won't even be able to see them. In the darkness of my room, without my glasses on, my vision is so blurry that someone could stand completely still and they might blend into darkness completely. I'd never know they were there, just staring at me.
This is why I sometimes hold my glasses in my sleep like a teddy bear or at the very least keep them right next to me on the dresser, so I can see anything I need to see easily at night.
4. Not Being Able to See Anything in the Shower or When You're Swimming
I mean, you can go swimming or take a shower with your glasses on, but so much water gets on them that you can't see anything out of them anyway. There's also always that risk that they will fall off while you are swimming and you will lose them forever.
Trying to find your glasses when you drop them on the floor... difficult. Trying to find your glasses when you drop them in a pool... impossible. Even if you get your friends with perfect vision to help you get the glasses and know exactly where you dropped them, you might never see them again.
So, you've probably decided to never wear your glasses while you are showering or swimming. It's a pain cleaning them afterwards anyway and getting rid of all the residue the droplets of water leave behind when they dry. It's fine, except for the parts where you lose your friends at the swimming pool and can't find them anymore. Or you see a black blob in the shower and can't tell if it's a spider or not. (Do you stick your head really close to see? Do you really want your face that close to a spider?) Or when you try to shave a part of your body, but can't see it without your glasses to tell whether or not you got all the hair off of it.
These situations are the only time when you might consider wearing contacts instead of glasses. But even then, losing a contact in the water is much worse than losing a pair of glasses.
5. Not Being Able to Wear Cool Sunglasses
That moment when you and someone else go shopping and they all of a sudden see a rack of sunglasses, so they go to try them on. You might foolishly try on a pair of sunglasses over your glasses, but it doesn't look right and it never will. Because you can't wear cool sunglasses.
At best, maybe you can have one pair of prescription sunglasses that you buy at the eye doctor, but they just aren't the same. At worst, you have clip-on sunglasses that you put on over your glasses and look like a dork in. Either way, you don't get to wear the cool sunglasses your friends do.
6. Being Jealous of People Who Can Get Cheap Pairs of Glasses at the Drug Store
There are people who have ten pairs of glasses, people who lose a pair and don't think it's a big deal, and people who don't have to wear glasses twenty-four hours a day. Those people buy their glasses at the drug store because they only have mild prescriptions and they only need them for reading.
But the rest of us who are blind without our glasses all the time, those who can't see far away or sometimes need bifocals... our glasses cost hundreds of dollars a pair. We've found deals, yes, for really cheap frames. Sometimes our frames are as cheap as one dollar a pair, but it doesn't help much. The problem was never the frames, it was the lenses, which always cost a couple hundred dollars apiece.
7. Laughing and Joking About How Blind You Are Without Your Glasses On
Why you do this? You don't know. But it's fun to take off your glasses and randomly point out to someone all the things you can't see. Like the pattern on their blouse or their facial features or a giant sign on the other side of the room.
8. Squinting at Something and Then Worrying Your Eyes Are Getting Worse
You had to squint to read that sign far away. The letters were pretty small and the sign is very far... no one, even with perfect vision, could read that sign, right? You don't know because it's been a very long time since you've had perfect vision, assuming that you ever did.
Are your eyes getting worse? You aren't sure. Maybe it's time to go to the eye doctor or maybe you just need to clean your glasses and see if that doesn't resolve the issue.
9. How Entertaining It Is When Your Glasses Suddenly Fog Up
It's unusually cold outside, or the drink you are sipping is hot. Before you know it, your glasses have fogged up. You laugh. You point it out to other people. You try to make it happen again once the fog goes away. It's very funny to you.
10. People Holding a Mirror up to Your Face When You Don't Have Glasses on and Expecting You to Be Able to See Your Reflection
You get your hair cut. You take your glasses off to get your hair cut and can't see a thing the entire time they are cutting your hair. You have to trust that they aren't messing everything up.
Then, before you put your glasses on, they are suddenly finished cutting your hair. They hold up a mirror to the back of your head and expect you to be able to see your hair. But you can't because your glasses aren't on.
Or, when you get your eyes checked and you have to find a new pair of frames. You try some on and the salesperson holds up a mirror for you to see them on yourself. You squint and hope they look good on you because you can't really see yourself and have no idea how you look.
You'd think of all people, they would understand, but they still don't.
Everyone is surprised that you can't see yourself in the mirror, like you are just wearing your glasses as some kind of gag or something. They forget that glasses are something that you actually need and not just an accessory choice you are making.
11. Looking Too Far in One Direction and Not Being Able to See Anything
Hold your head still and look as far as you can left or as far as you can upward. Just look with your eyes.
You're used to it, but the fact is, your entire visible world is stuck inside a frame. Always. And if you look too far in any direction without moving your head, the whole world is blurry once again.
You're so used to it that you don't notice it most of the time, but it's still there.
12. Hearing That One of the Symptoms of a Disease Is "Blurry Vision" and Giggling Because Your Vision Is Always Blurry
Or hearing that it's the side effect of a medication. May cause blurry vision? Hah! You already have blurry vision. They are too late!
13. The First Time You Wore Glasses and How Shocked You Were by All the Details of the World Around You
Let's face it. Most of us were reluctant to get our first pair of glasses. We put it off for as long as we could. We were scared or nervous about them for whatever reason and let ourselves function blind for far too long.
Then you put them on for the first time and are suddenly shocked by all the details in the world you've been missing.
For instance, my mom grew up with bright red hair and I was shocked when I put on my first pair of good glasses to find out that she had freckles all over her face and arms. I thought I knew how my mother looked, but it turned out, with better vision, she looked much different than I thought she did. It fascinated me.
I'm sure you have stories along these lines, too. Please tell me in the comments below!
It's always nerve wracking when you get a new pair of glasses because you know things are going to look different. And sometimes you can't tell if it will be a normal kind of different or the kind that makes you feel dizzy and confused for a while until your eyes adjust to the new prescription. So you're excited by every new pair and what new things you will be able to see, but also reluctant to get a new pair.
14. People with Perfect Vision Trying on Your Glasses and Loudly Exclaiming, "Whoa! You're Blind!"
People who try on your glasses always say they feel like they are on some kind of drug and start giggling about how weird the world around them looks with your glasses on, while you squint at them blindly.
They exclaim loudly, "Wow! You're really blind!"
Yes. That's why you wear glasses. You knew this already.
15. Comparing How Things Look with or Without Your Glasses On
For no reason at all, sometimes when you are with other people or by yourself, you will take your glasses off and look at something, then put them back on and look at the same thing, then repeat the steps. It's just fascinating how different things look with and without your glasses on.
Joshua Hanna on February 18, 2020:
Everyday after i come home from school my vision becomes blurry, and stays that way till the next morning...WHY!