Feminine Trends in Men's Fashion
I've lived through enough fashion trends to be OK with men wearing make-up, such as popular rock band, KISS or more recently Adam Lambert. I'm even physically turned on by the way thick black eyeliner highlights the stony blue in Brett Michael's eyes. I grew up during the 80's and 90's when anything from make-up, earrings, girly hairdos and products were considered completely normal for men.
Recently, I shared the nail polish isle with a guy and wondered how far will men venture into feminine trends? How much is acceptably attractive to the opposite sex before we feel icky and invaded? I have no problems lending my hair spray to my husband, but the day I catch him in a skirt, well, it won't be fashionably pretty.
Do These Jeans Make Me Look Manly?
All the boy bands, punk rock, and teen boy styles are sporting girls' jeans.
This fashion trend simply is not hot and I'll tell you why. One night I was attending a Basketball game with a couple of my guy friends and afterwards we were walking out to our cars when suddenly the guys stop dead in their tracks. Well, of course I assume they're checking out a girl so I don't pay much attention, but I slip a curious glance her way. She was bent over, reaching for something in her car, wearing I-can't-believe-she-can-still-breathe tight ass jeans.
What happened next was just a simple fact to prove God exists and has a sense of humor. My prayer answered; dirt on my guy friends I could joke about for years. Ahh YES! The object of their extreme interest stood up and turned around to reveal a dude in girl jeans. My friends were checking out and commenting about the nice ass on a DUDE. Again, thank you God! Don't get me wrong, I was a lady about the whole ordeal and generously offered to get the dude's number for them.
As far as I'm concerned, guys should not wear any article of clothing that encourages other guys to accidentally ogle and drool over them. Representing all the women out there, please don't wear our jeans and look better in them than us.
Does This Skirt Bring Out the Color of My Leg Hair?
Man-skirts, not kilts, but actual skirts. Apparently, as long as you put the word "man" in front of "skirts", it's politically correct and perfectly acceptable for a man to go prancing around in a skirt. Doing some research, I learned there are rules. #1 show some leg, but not too much. #2 must be thick, durable, type material. Nothing silky or too smooth. #3 Dark colors are best. #4 No pantyhose.
My first contact with a man-skirt happened not too long ago when I was taking a nature hike with my family. We came to a spot where the trail got steep, but luckily there were stairs and a railing. It was at this point I realized I was behind a guy who was wearing a man-skirt with hiking boots. Up and up we went and I thought if I looked directly above me I could probably see up this man's skirt. Sure enough I got a view of nature I wasn't planning on that day.
Honey, Will You Paint My Toenails?
It used to be sexy for a man to paint his woman's nails or toenails, now he's swooning her by asking her to paint his nails. I can't picture anything cuter than girlfriend and boyfriend painting each other's nails.
I'm really tolerant of silly fashion trends, mostly because I live far away enough from trendy areas so I never or hardly ever see them personally. However, men with polished nails is everywhere.
Brazilian Bikini/"Speedo" Wax
Getting a Wax Job
I used to hang out with bodybuilders and I'm not fond of overly hairy, beastly guys, but no man should be smoother than a woman or a baby. In fact, if you get near me with too smooth a butt, I will probably diaper it out of habit.
True story: I was on a date with a guy who was really smooth, no, not smooth as in gentleman-like or sweet talking, but smooth as in baby's butt. I asked him why he was so waxed and he answered he appreciated a woman who waxed so he wanted to return the favor. Reasonable, I thought.
Then he went on to say women who were completely waxed reminded him of young girls he dated in junior high, but he was now 30. I eagerly escaped the date, but nonetheless, I have been scarred for life, and not from the waxing process, but from any man smoother than me. Now I am careful to make sure I always have more hair on my body than I did when I was 13.
Man Purse or Satchel
Will You Hold My Purse Dear?
This man-purse trend became popular with the onset of metrosexuals; metropolitan heterosexuals. Basically, it's men who are more high maintenance than a woman.
There is a reason for women having a purse. We have to tote around female products and other things that make you guys squeamish. What's your excuse? Why would a guy need a purse? I can see the gender roles reversing. Now women will be scolding their husbands about forgetting his purse everywhere or mistaking his purse for hers.
No matter how you try to make it cool or name it something masculine, some trends are better left to the ladies. Get a duffle bag or a brief case- there are options. And in the future, I better not witness anything ridiculous like man-thongs rising above those way too baggy pants that some guys wear.
On a Serious Note . . .
Children are getting fashionable earleir in life and may mimick these trends. How do you feel about ads or media portraying young boys painting their toenails hot pink?